15 Confessions

Saturday, May 23, 2020

 


I can’t keep my own secrets – especially when it comes to cancer.

 

So, I have some things to confess.

 

1.     If you ask me to do something within the next 8 months and I don’t want to do it, I will play the cancer card.


2.     If I’m in a FitBit competition with you and I lose I’m going to play the cancer card.




3.     If I’m in a FitBit competition with you and I win, secretly I’m going to make fun of you for losing to the cancer girl.


4.     When you get diagnosed with cancer and you have lots of awesome friends you get lots of awesome gifts. It’s like Christmas but without family drama or bad holiday music and movies.


5.     Early in my diagnosis I would treat myself to Chick Fil A after every doctor’s appointment and I once wrote in my journal, “This probably isn’t good for my health, but I already have cancer, so, what the hell!”


6.     If I reach my goal weight this year, I’m going to be pissed that people are going to give cancer all the credit.


7.     If I gain a lot of weight this year, I’m going to make sure cancer gets all the blame.


8.     Lately, I’ve been online shopping like an old lady watching Home Shopping Network and with each purchase I say to myself “You deserve it! You’re fighting cancer!” as if Alabama Power or my mortgage company cares.


9.     When I was diagnosed with cancer one of my first thoughts was, “Crap! Is this going to mess up my plans to walk for exercise every day for 366 days?” (So far, it hasn’t!)



Related Reading: Why I Walk Every Single Day



10.  When I was diagnosed with cancer my first question for the doctor was, “Can I still work?” This Enneagram Type 1 is always on-brand.


11.  I initially wanted to title my blog post announcing my diagnosis this: “Y’all thought I was inspirational before --- hold my boob!” Fortunately, I decided against that.


12.  Once COVID-19 stops ruining the world, I fully intend to exploit my diagnosis for a chance to meet Beyonce or to hang out with Elaine Welteroth. There has to be an adult division of Make a Wish Foundation, right?


13.   When searching online for headscarves to wear once the chemo takes my hair I actually said – out loud – “Cancer, but make it fashion!”


14.  I’m pretty sure the amount of money I’m going to save on hair care products will cover the cost of my cancer treatments.


15.  My main motivation to beat cancer and survive chemo is not wanting my husband to remarry. I don’t want some other woman with my man or in my house. Sorry. Not sorry.



27 comments:

  1. I love me some you. Sending you love, chickie. You got this. ����

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  2. This is so great and SO you! And you know I would totally be using that cancer card for everything as well. Love and miss you!

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    Replies
    1. Love you and miss you, too! When this is all over we must get together to celebrate!

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  3. I can't love this post enough! Sending lots of love and prayers your way.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you and I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

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  4. You made me holler about your house and your man, but I feel you lol

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    1. I'm just saying. I have worked to hard on this marriage and on this house!

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  5. Oh my word did this have me legit LOL’ing. In all of its honesty with the sprinkle of humor! Love it and love you. And you know—if you’ve got it, flaunt it- this is true in most things, and clearly cancer is one of them!!✨

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    Replies
    1. Well, you know they say honesty is the best policy. LOL!

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  6. Love this and love you!!!💖💖

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  7. Thanks for sharing this journey with us. I know it's not one that anyone would plan, but it's one we will get through together. Love you!

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    Replies
    1. Yes! I know that with the help of friends like you I will get through this!

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  8. Thank for sharing! I love this post!

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  9. Laughing and crying at the same time!!! I love this post!!

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