Don't leave your writing success to chance. Pray about it!
(And, yes, I do have Hello Kitty fuzzy dice in my car.)

Do you pray before you write?

I don't.

I pray before I travel, I pray before I teach, and I always pray before I run a 5K or half-marathon. But I don't pray before I write. 

I don't pray before I write because I'm cocky. While I recognize that my writing talent is a gift from God, because writing is so natural to me I tend to think I don't need any extra help. I feel as if God has given me the gift of writing so I can take it from here. But I couldn't be more wrong. 

I may be a good writer, but I'm not a great one, and I could certainly use some supernatural assistance to get me there. Plus, there's so much even beyond the quality of work that a writer should pray about when it comes to her craft. We need to pray for inspiration and we need to pray that our writing will somehow touch the lives of others. 

Chances are, however, you're not the arrogant jerk that I am. Chances are, you don't pray before you write because you feel as if you shouldn't bother God with such things. You believe that prayers of supplication should be reserved for times of dire need or times when you're concerned about the well-being of a loved one. But we are told over and over in Scripture to go to God about everything. 

This is something I've struggled with myself and, believe it or not, God used my car bumper to teach me to pray about all things. Less than one week after I bought the car I'm currently driving I hit a huge gas container that was sitting in the middle of the highway. The result was an unsightly dent in my fender. For weeks I terribly upset about this. I knew it was silly to be so distraught. I should have been happy that no serious damage had been done and thankful to have a car at all. So I prayed and simply asked God to help me get over it. Ironically, I was driving when I decided to pray this prayer and as soon as I said "Amen" Francesca Battistelli's song "Free To Be Me" came on the radio. In case you're unfamiliar with the song, check out the chorus:

'Cause I got a couple dents in my fender 

Got a couple rips in my jeans 

Try to fit the pieces together 

But perfection is my enemy 

On my own I'm so clumsy 

But on your shoulders I can see 

I'm free to be me

As the song played all I could do was laugh. I think I was even wearing ripped jeans that day. Needless to say, I got over the dent in my fender. In fact, I completely forgot it was there. But imagine my surprise (and the one-woman praise party that ensued) when one day later that summer I was washing my car and discovered the dent was gone! 

If God cares about a stupid dent in the bumper of my Mazda 3, certainly He cares about your writing, certainly He cares about you effectively using the gifts He gave you. 

1 Thessalonians 5:17 tells us to "pray continually." 

Philippians 4:6 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

And in John 14:14 Jesus told his disciples, "You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it." 

So before you write your next blog post, your next article, your next short story or poem, or the next section of your book, pray about the words you will write and pray for the people who will read them. 

For two years now I have led women's small groups through my church. These groups have been on various topics but have all basically been bible study nights that I've held on Monday evenings at my apartment.

This summer I wanted to do something different, but couldn't quite figure out what to do. Each time I'd come up with an idea I'd quickly realize why that idea wouldn't work. A friend of mine suggested I not lead a small group at all this summer since I am, you know, starting a magazine. That's kind of a big deal and will keep me plenty busy. But still, I felt called to lead.

Then one morning during my personal quiet time of bible study and prayer it came to me -- lead a small group for women writers, host it at various local coffee shops, and call it Words With Friends!

I immediately came up with the brief description to include on the online small group directory:

Do you like to write, blog, or journal? Join us this summer for fellowship, quiet time to write, and discussion on how we can use our writing gifts for God.

Still I had my doubts. This seemed too easy. Was this actually an idea from God or was this my own selfish, sneaky mind concocting a way to hang out in a coffee shop and write and call it ministry?

And as the launch date for the summer small group semester got closer, I also started to panic as I realized that I didn't really know what to tell woman who wanted to know how she could use her writing gift for God. Personally, I look to blogs like She Reads Truth and Jamie the Very Worst Missionary for inspiration, but what if blogging isn't your thing? Then what?

My prayer on Saturday had been that I'd receive some sort of inspiration for my small group at Sunday's church service. So I go to church and Steve Blair, a minister at my church, takes the stage to deliver a message that's about ...wait for it... using your gifts for God! I wanted to run laps around the sanctuary I was so excited.

To me this was confirmation that my small group idea truly was from God.

So how can we writers use our writing gifts to serve God? The answer is quite simple really. We must use our writing gifts (or any gifts) to serve people. This will look different for different writers. For me I serve others primarily with See Jane Write. For you, you it may be through a blog. Or maybe you're meant to tutor a student who needs help with composition. Or maybe you can start a creative writing program for at-risk teens or a "write to wellness" workshop for women struggling to cope with hurtful past experiences. The possibilities are endless.

My Words With Friends small group is not limited to women who are members of Church of the Highlands. If you live in Birmingham and you're free on Monday evenings from 6:30 to 8 p.m.  I'd love for you to join me. We'll meet at various local coffee shops. Meetings begin June 3. If you're interested email me at javacia@gmail.com.

Write on and keep the faith!

Image by Renato Ganoza via Flickr/Creative Commons

When it comes to my relationship with God I am a complete brat.

When God throws problems and challenges my way I throw tantrums that can rival anything that you've seen from a toddler in the middle of Wal-Mart. You would think that now that I'm well into my 30s I would be more spiritually mature. And sometimes I am. Sometimes I face challenges with a cool head and I respond by calmly and confidently going to God in prayer. But most times I just pitch a fit, as my mom would say.

This month, however, my response to tribulation has gotten even worse. In the past after things have all worked out (because they always work out) I would go to God, ask for forgiveness for my pity party, and then have a praise party instead. But this month I've been so frustrated that even when my trials have been resolved I've continued my complaining. I've asked God why was this obstacle put before me in the first place. (Yeah, I know. I'm awful.) Quickly, I fell back into my old way of thinking. Quickly, I decided that God is angry with me, that God doesn't love me as much as my pastor claims he does.

God is love. That's a phrase so common it's become cliche. But it's a phrase I believe. Sometimes. I repeat this phrase to friends who fear God has turned his back on them because of their sins. I repeat this phrase to gay friends who have heard from their own family members that disgusting saying "God hates fags." And I repeat the phrase "God is love" to friends worried that God won't provide for their needs. And when I tell these friends that God loves them I mean it with every ounce of my being. But I can't seem to mean it when I say it to myself. And when things go wrong in my life I just point to these problems as evidence that God gets a kick out of making my life hard.

But this week during my study of Priscilla Shirer's One In a Million I was reminded that each challenge I face in life is only a test and these tests aren't designed to entertain God like a bad reality TV show. Life's obstacles are there to teach me to fully rely on God, and God wants me to depend on him because it's in my best interest to do so. If I rely on anything or anyone else, including myself, I will be disappointed.

As Shirer writes, "The Lord wants us to thirst not after a quick fix to our problems but after the life-altering refreshment of His provision."

So the next time a problem comes your way, whether big or small, remember this is only a test.

Run after your dreams with childlike faith!
Image by Mike Baird via Flickr/Creative Commons

We Christians are taught we must have childlike faith in God. We are told to believe everything will work out even when all hell is breaking loose. We are to follow God's lead even when it seems like the maps on his GPS are out-of-date.

I've always struggled with having childlike faith as I'm a person who questions everything and because I am the ultimate control freak. I'm so much of a control freak that I don't even like surprise parties.

Ironically, having childlike faith in God is slowly getting easier as I get older. I'm realizing that most things are out of my control anyway because God is sovereign. And it's becoming easier to accept that God's ways are not my ways and that some things I just won't understand this side of heaven, as the old folks say. But if I truly believe that God loves me then I can trust that whatever happens is in my best interest in the end, even if in the moment it completely sucks.

A few days ago, however, I started thinking about how all of us -- regardless of our religious beliefs -- need to have childlike faith in ourselves.


On Feb. 19, Redhot Writing Hood wrote a great post on kicking self-doubt to the curb. In the post she points out that self-doubt is a learned behavior because as children we believe we can be and do anything. She writes:

As a child we could imagine ourselves as becoming anything in the world, a ballerina, an astronaut, a marine biologist... We never doubted we had it in us to become these things. We saw life through the eyes of our parents and teachers who said we could do anything and be anything... Then as we grew older we start to realize maybe they were wrong.

We start to doubt ourselves because as we grow older we face failure and rejection. But what would happen if we chose to believe in ourselves anyway?

There was a time when I wanted to be the first female president of the United States. When I was a teenager I wanted to launch my own magazine. We let go of some dreams because our goals and interests change. I realized I'm not interested in politics enough to run for any office. But sometimes we let go of dreams because our rational selves, our self-doubt tells us to do so. How on earth could I start a magazine with journalism in such a tumultuous state?

But then I think of my students and how they have yet to let self-doubt discourage them. I think of the boy who believes he will one day be an Oscar-winning filmmaker, the girl who believes she'll one day be a soloist for American Ballet Theatre. And I believe in them too because their passion for their art is so strong. So why can't I believe in myself for the same reason?

Just as I believe God's love for me is strong enough to help me endure any hardship, I need to have childlike faith that my love for writing will be strong enough to make my dreams come true.

Image by Kristin Nador via Flickr/Creative Commons

I was late for church yesterday. So God decided to teach me a lesson, but not about tardiness.

I was late because I missed my exit. I've been driving to this church nearly every Sunday morning for over three years and I missed my freaking exit. I missed my exit because I was lost in thought. Usually on Sunday mornings I change my radio dial from my local NPR station and tune into the local contemporary Christian station so that I can prepare my heart and mind for worship. Yesterday, though my radio was tuned to God music, my mind was not tuned to God thoughts. I was busy thinking about my latest writing project, so much so that I missed my exit.

As I was yelling "Are you kidding me?!" at my dashboard as if it were going to somehow give me back those lost minutes a voice inside me calmly said, "If you aren't focused on me you're going to go the wrong way."




And with that God basically punched me in the gut. I fought back tears because I obviously would have no time to reapply my mascara in the parking lot. I yelled (to the dashboard again): "OK, God. I get it. We'll discuss this more later."

For those of you who don't know, my church is ginormous. We have four Sunday services and additional campuses all across the state to accommodate about 23,000 weekly attendees.  In other words, if you arrive late the chances you're going to find a seat up front are about as good as God speaking to you via a burning bush. But I guess I need to be on the lookout for flaming foliage because as I was searching around for a spot an usher came to me and said, "There's room for one up front." I landed a spot on the second row.

I'd never sat up front before because I never wanted to bother with the hunt such a seat requires and I never understood why some of my pals made such a big deal over it. But yesterday both worship and the message seemed better than ever! And I think I know why. The service wasn't necessarily any more awesome than it usually is; I was just paying better attention. I admit that I am very easily distracted ALL THE TIME, even at church. I'll be in the middle of singing about God's holy name when someone walks in with a gorgeous bag and I'm suddenly praising the name of Kate Spade instead of Jesus Christ.

At the end of the service that little voice that nearly ruined my makeup in the car had something else to say: "The closer you are to me, the less distracted you will be."

I thought we agreed to talk about this later.

OK. OK. I really, really get it. I've been so focused on my goals that I've been ignoring my God, even though I fooled myself into thinking I was putting God first because I was constantly praying about my dreams.

But at the end of the day, I have to love God more than I love my dream.

Image by Gary Stevens via Flickr/Creative Commons

I should be a blogging superstar.

I should have enough sponsors and unique monthly visitors to quit my day job if I wanted to. I should be speaking at blogging conferences across the country. I should have a book deal and a monthly column in my favorite magazine.

But I don't.

I'm not saying I should have these things because I think I'm so awesome that everyone in the blogosphere should love me. I'm saying I've been blogging, in some capacity or another, for over five years and I've read every piece of blogging advice I could get my eyes on along the way.

I'm also good at picking out blogs with great potential. For example, I wrote about Julie Zeilinger when she first started  The F-Bomb, a blog and online community created by and for teenage girls who care about women's rights. Her blog is wildly popular and landed her a book deal. Her book about the next generation of feminism,  “A Little F’d Up: Why Feminism Is Not A Dirty Word,” was published by Seal Press in the spring of 2012. She's even been a guest on the show of one of my girl crushes Melissa Harris-Perry. Also last year I wrote about Around the Way Curls. They were recently featured Essence magazine and were recognized as one of  the Black Bloggers You Should Know for 2012 by The Root. 

So if I have a wealth of web wisdom stored away in notebooks and an eye for good blogs, why haven't I achieved the success I dream of? That's easy: I don't practice what I preach. Through the years, I haven't been following the very blogging advice I often offer on my own sites.

Here are the top five blogging tips I've failed to follow:

• Find a niche. The biggest blogging mistake I've made in the past is trying to be everything to everybody. As counter-intuitive as it may seem, the more focused your blog is the more likely you are to attract a large and loyal following. Thus, being Feb. 1 this blog will be focused on writing, wellness, and women's empowerment. 

• Take risks. Along the same lines of trying to be everything to everybody, I've also wasted a lot of time trying to get people to like me. I've worried about writing things that would offend people or cause people to criticize me. This is stupid. Bill Cosby once said, “I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.” Amen. Furthermore, I have found that my posts that are the most controversial are the ones that garner the most hits. So I'm putting my big girl panties on and I'm going to strive to really establish myself as a feminist blogger.

• Be consistent. I am bad about going through phases of blogging like crazy and posting every day and then getting busy with life and abandoning my blog for a week or even longer. One of the things I appreciate most about one of my favorite writing blogs is the blogger's consistency. It's also important to be consistent regarding the type of content you publish and your writing voice. Beginning Feb. 1, I'll be posting new content each weekday. If this becomes too tough I'll let you know and begin to post three days a week -- Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. 

• Don't be afraid to self-promote. While I, of course appreciate an occasional "atta-girl" I am utterly embarrassed by any grand gestures of recognition that come my way. Last year when I was recognized as one of the top 10 "Smart Women" of Birmingham for my work with See Jane Write I thought I was going to vomit when I went on stage to accept my award. Don't get me wrong; I certainly appreciated the recognition and it gave me the encouragement I needed to keep growing See Jane Write. But when someone at my school found out about it and emailed an announcement to the entire faculty I nearly peed my pants. But this has to end. The only way I'm going to get the word out about my blog and about See Jane Write is to promote, promote, promote. So in 2013 I plan to be a total media whore. You've been warned.

• Keep pushing. I get bored easily. If I'm working on a project that isn't progressing as quickly as I had hoped, I drop it. The only way to grow a blog is to actually, well, grow it. It takes commitment and hard work and being mature enough not to run off for something shiny and new. It's time for this Writeous Babe to grow up.

If nothing else can motivate me to lose weight and get back in shape, I'm sure money and the threat of public humiliation will.

And so I've signed up for Scale Back Alabama. This annual statewide weight-loss contest is in its seventh year, but this is my first time to participate. Participants are to be in teams of four. If each member of your team has lost at least 10 pounds at the end of the 10-week contest, your team is entered in a drawing to win cash prizes. The top prize is $1,000 per team member!

Show me the money!

On Saturday my team and I weighed in Medical Weight Loss Solutions and then I went for an hour-long jog as soon as I left. I'm determined to shed at least 10 pounds because I don't want to be the jerk who made her teammates miss out on $1,000!

When I posted on Facebook that I had just signed up for Scale Back Alabama my cousin/BFF replied with this comment: "Javacia, you have no weight to lose."

I get this comment a lot when I mention I want to drop pounds. But I know something they don't: the number that stares back at me when I step on the scale. Most people would have a hard time guessing my weight by looking at me. The last time I was weighed at the doctor the nurse in charge looked at the number and exclaimed: "Well, that can't be right! You're so little." My response: "Well, apparently not."

There was a time when I didn't care about my weight or my BMI. In the past I've always been pretty muscular and since I know muscle weighs more than fat, I didn't give the number on the scale a second thought. Plus, I wore a size 4 or 6.

Those days are long gone. Most of that muscle has morphed to fat and I now wear a size 10 or 12.

Now, I'm not all depressed and rocking back and forth in a dark room over this. I know my weight and my dress size don't measure my worth as a woman. And I know my husband doesn't find me any less attractive. (In fact, he seems to be excited that I've gained weight. Southern men like 'em thick.) But my BMI has me on edge because it tells me I'm officially "overweight" which means I could be at risk for more health complications.

This is the part of the post when I do something I've never done before and share my weight with all my readers. I won't even tell my husband how much I weigh when he asks, so this is a big deal.

That's what I weighed yesterday afternoon and thus my BMI is around 29. The scale at the weigh-in center put me at 168 pounds. I doubt I lost half a pound in 24 hours, but just in case I did I'll be going for another hour-log jog today.

And let's hope that in 10 weeks I'll be 10 pounds lighter and $1,000 richer!

Recently my sweet friends Jennifer, Sherri, and Tanya gave me the Inspiring Blog award. This really meant a lot to me because they all write blogs that inspire me to be fit, to be happy, and to live my best life. They are also members of See Jane Write and thus a part of something in my life that started out as a project but over time has become my purpose. 

To give back to the blogging community, receipt of this award comes with the following tasks:

• Display the award image on your blog.
• Link back to the person who nominated you.
• State 7 things about yourself.
• Nominate 15 other bloggers and link to their sites.
• Notify the bloggers that they have been nominated and link to the post.

So here we go...

7 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Me...Until Now

1. As a child I was afraid of Bruce Springsteen's voice, the gorilla at Showbiz, and the Michael Jackson Thriller poster my parents bought for me but had to stash in a bottom drawer until I conquered my fear.  

2. Thanks to my husband, I could probably win first place in a wrestling trivia game. 

3. I have the telephone number of 90s R&B star Ginuwine in my cell phone. 

4. In 2009 I had a 30-minute phone conversation with Jamie Foxx. To this day it's the best interview I've ever done and I still have it saved on my voice recorder. 

5. When I want my hair straightened and/or cut I drive all the way to Montgomery to the only person I trust with my curly coif. 

6. And speaking of my hair, it's most likely because of my tresses that I get asked every other week what island I'm from. Sigh.

7. My name has been legally changed four times. Seriously. 

And now...

15 Inspirational Blogs

1. The Very Worst Missionary
2. Stellar Fashion and Fitness 
3. All In Stride 
4. You Got Rossed 
5. E is for Erin 
6. Goins Writer
7. Britni Danielle
8. Redbone Afropuff
9. Writability
10. Jamie's Rabbits
11. Pink of Perfection
12. A Place to Dwell 
13. Sometimes Sweet
14. Write, Clair, write!
15. Evette Dionne

If you've been cruising down Lakeshore Parkway lately there's a chance you've pulled up next to a black Mazda 3 and caught a chick with big curly hair singing her heart out to the Alicia Keys song "Brand New Me."  That chick was me.

We're at the start of a new year and this is a time when many people start trying to make changes in their lives. As writers, we resolve to write a certain number of words each day, to read more, to blog more, and to be more aggressive in our efforts to get published. Then December rolls around and we haven't accomplished half as much as we had hoped. And this is usually the case with goals in other areas of life -- such as fitness and finances -- as well.

Where did we go wrong? Yesterday, my pastor had a pretty poignant message on this topic. He said that we ought to just start wishing one another a "Happy Improved Year!" instead of a happy new year because what we're trying do to with all our resolutions is change ourselves from the outside in instead of changing from the inside out. We're tying to do something different when we need to be someone different. Instead of improving the old you, become a new you. We need a New Year's revolution, not a New Year's resolution.

How do we do this? We must get centered. This will mean different things for different people, but it's imperative nonetheless. We must get focused on whatever is the cornerstone of our lives. Once we've done that we will want to do the things that must be done to accomplish our goals. It will no longer be a matter of wrestling with our wills to keep our resolutions to write daily or exercise five times a week. Once we're centered we will jump out of bed ready to write; we'll actually look forward to going to the gym.

For me getting centered means drawing near to God. It means praying constantly, reading Scripture daily, using my writing to encourage others, and forging meaningful connections with other women of faith. When I do these things I can feel myself transforming into the woman I'm meant be and I know that I will accomplish all this woman was meant to do.

"By faith we understand that the entire universe was formed at God's command..." 

~ Hebrews 11:3

Image via Flickr/Creative Commons

I believe in the power of words. Since I'm a writer, you probably already knew that.

But the Jesus freak in me also drives my belief that words are important. With words the Creator spoke the world into being and with the written words of sacred texts, that same Creator communicates with us humans. John 1:1 says that Jesus is actually the living Word of God. Thus, it seems like words are a pretty big deal to God, so they should be a pretty big deal to me too.

Last week Sheree Martin of The Ben Franklin Follies asked such an intriguing question about words:

Can three words inspire, motivate — even define you for an entire year? A lifetime? If words shape our thoughts, our emotions, our actions, it would seem so.

And I completely agree with Sheree, who chose zoom, vivace, and jazz for her words. I was eager to come up with three words of my own to guide my year. Then I remembered my vow to let direct my plans for 2013 and I started pouted saying, "But God, I wanna play too!" 

Right after I read Sheree's post a tweet by Jamie Golden led me to her blog Jamie's Rabbits. Jamie confessed that she'd had a "Bah humbug" attitude toward the gratitude posts everyone was sharing on Facebook during the month of December.  "Then," she said, "God found Himself in my face for the upteenth time. He started with scripture. HE ALWAYS STARTS WITH THE DANG BIBLE." 

That scripture was I Thessalonians 5:16-18 -- Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances...

And just like that God told me I could play along too and showed me what my three words should be. 

Image by Ruben Vique via Flickr/Creative Commons

 Joy. 

I've struggled with depression most of my life and since anti-depressants turn me into a zombie I've been searching for other ways to cope. 

A couple of years ago I stumbled upon the quote "Joy is a choice" and added it to my vision board hoping it would serve as daily encouragement. Instead it became a daily annoyance. Choosing joy is hard! And that cute little quote scribbled on a yellow index card was not making it any easier. (I confess to throwing a shoe or two at my vision board thanks to this quote.)

I shared this story with someone who was praying with me this weekend at a church retreat. She looked at me and said, "God wants you to know that joy is a Person. And that person lives within you." And with that I felt the weight 10,000 vision boards lift from my shoulders. Instead of working to be happy I need to simply bask in God's presence, which leads me to my second word...

Prayer Booth
Image by Zach Alexander via Flickr/Creative Commons

Communion. 

Merriam-Webster defines communion as an act or instance of sharing or intimate fellowship or rapport. In 2013 my hope is to have intimate fellowship with God through prayer, worship, and study of the Bible, and by serving other people. The word communion not only makes me think of God, but also the people I love. In 2013, I want to spend more quality time with my friends and family and find more ways to inspire women writers.

Image via Flickr/Creative Commons

Gratitude. 

In 2013 I want to "give thanks in all circumstances." When things are great at work, when See Jane Write is being celebrated, when more and more people start reading my blog, and when freelance gigs come pouring in I want to give thanks to God and be careful not to take credit for these blessings. And when my students are driving me crazy, when I'm frustrated with See Jane Write, when I feel like no one cares about anything I write, and when the freelance jobs are scarce I want to still give thanks because I know that bad days only make good days sweeter and challenges only make me stronger. And I will give thanks because I believe the words found in Romans 8:28 --  "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

What three words will guide you in the year 2013? 

Image by Garrett via Flickr/Creative Commons

For the past month the senior pastor of my church has been teaching on the idea of legacy and how to really make a difference in the world.

Yesterday, he told us to leave a legacy we have to:
1. Do what we should do.
2. Do what we could do.
3. Do what we would do.

Doing what you should do is, quite simply, about doing the right thing. It's about being faithful, finishing what you start, and keeping your word.

Doing what you could do is a bit more difficult. This is something that requires us to give up something. Consider the meaningful things you could be doing if you stopped doing some of the less important things that take up so much of your time now. Doing what you could do is about sacrifice. Yesterday my pastor reminded us that, "Leaving a legacy will always cost you something."

Doing what you would do, however, if even more of a challenge. This one is about faith. It's about having the courage to dream. Think of all the times you've said, "Oh I would do (fill in the blank) if only I had..." So here's your challenge: do it anyway. Pursue that lofty aspiration even if you don't have enough time, enough money, enough education, or enough connections. Do it anyway.

And once you have achieved that dream against all odds you can be sure you will be leaving a legacy that will inspire others for years to come.

When  I was in my early 20s I kept a little notebook of inspirational quotes and carried it with me all the time. That book would have come in handy last night as I was watching Black Girls Rock.

Black Girls Rock is a non-profit youth empowerment organization that promotes the arts for young women of color. Founded by Beverly Bond, the group also encourages an analysis of the ways women of color are portrayed in the media and hosts an annual awards show that airs on BET. 

The women honored at this year's awards show were offering up so many words of wisdom I could barely keep up as I was scribbling their sage sayings onto any pieces of paper within my reach.

Actress Regina King, who hosted the show with Tracee Ellis Ross, said to the audience at the start of the show, "We can solve any problems when we stand strong and support each other."

Even though Black Girls Rock is mostly about celebrating the accomplishments of African-American women, I believe King's statement applies to all women regardless of race, color, or nationality. When women band together we have the power to bring about change. I believe in the value of community which is exactly why I started See Jane Write.

Kerry Washington
Image by David Shankbone via Flickr/Creative Commons

Kerry Washington, star of the hit ABC show Scandal, was one of the night's honorees. Washington is the first black woman to lead a prime-time serious on a major network in 38 years and is known for playing an active role in politics helping most recently with the Obama campaign.

"True power comes from authenticity," Washington said. "Power come from being yourself."

Janelle Monae
Image by Michael Dornbierer via Flickr/Creative Commons

Janelle Monae, another celebrant at the event, is proof that Washington is right. Monae has made a name for herself in the music industry without changing her style or her unique sound to conform to trends. She was even recently tapped to be a Cover Girl.

"I didn't have to change who I was to become a Cover Girl," Monae said. "I didn't have to become perfect. Perfection is often the enemy of greatness."

She went on to say, "Embrace what makes you unique even if it makes other people uncomfortable."

Alicia Keys
Image by Walmart Stores via Flickr/Creative Commons

Singer Alicia Keys was also recognized for both her accomplishments in music and her foundation Keep a Child Alive, which is dedicated to providing life-saving AIDS treatment and support services to families affected by HIV/AIDS in Africa and India.

Keys reminded black girls (and women) of this: "Everything that you want to be you already are and you are simply on the path of discovering it."

Image by J. Money via Flickr/Creative Commons

Since I'm a writer, blogger and feminist it should come as no surprise that Julie & Julia is one of my favorite films. I watched this great Nora Ephron movie Friday night and by the end my enthusiasm for blogging was renewed. 

I started thinking about Julie Powell and other bloggers who have been wildly popular and landed book deals because of their websites. The one thing these writers seem to have in common is that they were willing to do something crazy. Naysayers may call it a gimmick, and perhaps for some it is just that. But when I think about Julie Powell and women like Rachel Bertsche, author of the blog and book MWF Seeking BFF, they were all willing to do something that took courage and discipline, whether that was cooking 524 Julia Child recipes in 365 days or going on fifty-two friend-dates, one per week for a year, in hopes of meeting a new Best Friend Forever.

And so I present a challenge. 

November can be a lonely month for us creative non-fiction writers because in November many of our ambitious fiction writer pals are busy with National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo.

So I thought, what if we bloggers had a project of our own for the month of November.

Inspired by Tarayi Jones' #writelikecrazy, in which she encouraged writers to write every day for a month, I've decided to launch #bloglikecrazy for the month of November.

Here's the #bloglikecrazy challenge: publish a meaningful blog post every single day in November. That's 30 posts in 30 days. 

I've tried to do this several times before and failed miserably. But I figure I'd be a bit more motivated if I'm actually leading this endeavor.

So are you with me?

Project #bloglikecrazy will begin Nov. 1. 

Also, if you'd like you can sign up for me to send you writing prompts throughout November to help get those creative juices flowing. Just email me at javacia@gmail.com with #bloglikecrazy in the subject line and in the body of the email simply say "I want prompts so I can #bloglikecrazy!"

So does this mean that after blogging for 30 days you'll get a book deal? Probably not. But at the end of November you will be more dedicated to your blog and it's dedication that will help you make your writing dreams come true. 

So let's blog like crazy!

This award is amazing. The letters spelling the word "SMART" are from photographs of different Birmingham landmarks.

For example, the "S" is from Sloss Furnaces and the "A" from the Alabama Theatre. 

I'm not one who seeks out recognition and accolades. In fact, I tend to be rather embarrassed by that sort of attention. Nevertheless, I do like to know I am appreciated and I'm crushed when I feel completely ignored.

Sometimes, I fall into the trap of self-pity. I start telling myself that all the things I do for my students, for the women of See Jane Write and for my friends don't really matter; I tell myself no one really cares. I even go through phases in which I convince myself I don't have any friends.

The next time these feelings start to creep in all I have to do is remember the past few days to chase those thoughts away.

On Thursday I was honored as one of the "smartest women in Birmingham" at the Women's Fund of Greater Birmingham's SMART Party fundraiser. I was recognized primarily for my work with See Jane Write and while I was a humbled and even embarrassed to be in a group that included an accomplished archaeologist and the director of the Birmingham Public Library, it was nice to know that my city cares about the organization I'm trying to build.

On that day, however, I wasn't walking around thinking to myself, "I feel so smart." Instead, I was thinking, "I feel so loved."

My cousin/BFF/sister from another mister lives out of town and couldn't make it to the SMART Party. So she sent me a Hello Kitty-themed Edible Arrangement instead.

When I got home from work my husband had a dozen yellow long stemmed roses (and a teddy bear wearing a Hello Kitty shower cap) waiting for me.

A friend who was out of the country bought two tickets to the party just to show her support.

One of my co-workers came out to the SMART Party despite the fact that she was feeling under the weather.

A friend who recently had a baby, we'll call her A., and, therefore, had a VERY good excuse for staying home, surprised me and came to the event with one of my best friends from church. I could hear them cheering me on as I went on the stage to accept my award.

But it didn't stop there. A. planned a dinner for me and hubster (who recently got a new job) and a few of our closest pals on Saturday at the Mexican restaurant La Paz. Our friends wrote us notes of congratulations and appreciation and said we inspired them. My cousin made the drive up from Montgomery to be there and  A. even bought us cupcakes from Dreamcakes!

With my girls at La Paz

Cupcakes!

Clearly all those thoughts of not being appreciated or not having friends were gone like a vapor in the wind. And those doubts about the impact I make on students? Last week I had one student thank me for properly preparing him for senior year by teaching him how to write essays and analyze literature. And a few of my female students told me I've inspired them to start a young feminists group. They even want to publish their own 'zine!

But I'm not telling you all this to say I'm special. I'm telling you this because I am sure that just as my efforts are appreciated (even when I think they're not), your hard work is being noticed too. People are watching. People do care. So keep shining.

Image by Steven Depolo via Flickr/Creative Commons

 "Can you unscramble eggs?"

When my pastor posted this on Facebook and Twitter Saturday I thought, "That man has been working too hard."

But it all made sense once I went to church Sunday and heard a thought-provoking message on regret delivered by one of our associate pastors.

Regret, much like fear, is something we all experience at some point in our lives whether it's regarding relationships or our career goals. And, unfortunately, regret often keeps us from going to the next level in our relationships and in our careers.

But stewing in regret is as futile as trying to unscramble eggs. Regret tries to convince you that if you feel bad long enough you'll eventually feel better. Regret tells you that if you beat yourself up enough about a bad decision you made, things will eventually improve. This is a lie.

The message to us on Sunday was this: You can't unscramble eggs, but God can.

What I took away was that the keys to getting over regret are forgiveness and focus.

As a Christian I must make sure I truly believe that God forgives me no matter how much I screw up. And all of us, regardless of our faith, must learn to forgive ourselves.

This is easier said than done. One day you think that you've forgiven yourself, that you've finally let yourself off the hook, and then the next day you can barely look at yourself in the mirror.

This is why you need focus. Those "if only" thoughts are bound to haunt you occasionally: "If only I had taken that job and not this one," "If only I had gone out on that date," "If only I had been more responsible with my money."

But when these thoughts try to creep into your mind, get focused! Get focused on your goals and dreams. Turn regret into motivation.

I believe that after God forgives us, God gives us a mission and a purpose to pursue. After you forgive yourself, you need to do the same. Get over it and then get to work!

And don't think that what you've done in the past -- no matter how awful or how stupid -- disqualifies you from doing great things in the future. In fact, you will probably find that it actually qualifies you for the tasks ahead. The lessons you learned from your mistakes can be passed on to others. The weaknesses of your past can be your source of strength in the future, especially if you're a writer. Think of the masterpieces you can create and the lives you can touch thanks to what you've endured. Never underestimate the power of a personal story.

And now you know how to unscramble eggs.

Me and my girls at reCreate 2012!

"This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine. 

This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine, let it shine, let it shine, let it shine."

Whether or not you grew up in church, you probably know the famous hymn "This Little Light of Mine." 

I have many memories of singing this song during worship services, Sunday School classes or at Vacation Bible School camps I occasionally attended with my cousin. 

Being the kind of kid who always over-analyzed things and drove my parents and teachers crazy with questions, I often wondered to myself, "What is my light, what does it actually mean to let it shine and why do I need to do it?" And to be honest I never found answers to my questions until three days ago. 

This weekend I attended the reCreate Women's Conference, an annual two-day event held at Church of the Highlands and the highlight of my fall. 

Pastor and author Holly Wagner was one of the speakers at this year's event and I was so excited to hear her message. She spoke at the conference two years ago and I left the church that weekend ready to take on the world and I was eager to have that feeling again. 

Wagner's Friday evening talk was all about being a light. What is your light? Those personality traits, talents, and skills that you have that make the world a brighter place. Your light is your wisdom, your knowledge, and your accomplishments. 

As a Christian, I believe that light comes from God, but the lessons imparted by Wagner on Friday night were, in my opinion, valuable for anyone regardless of their religious beliefs. 

Many of us aren't quite sure what to do with this light. Some of us are so shy and unsure of ourselves that we hide our light. For instance, we may be a talented writer afraid to share our work with others. And this is exactly what Jesus says we should not do. In Luke 11:33 he says, “No one lights a lamp and puts it in a place where it will be hidden, or under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, so that those who come in may see the light."

Some of us love the light, the spotlight, that is, and we think our talents and achievements are all about us. We think the light is there for us to bask in and be celebrated. Those of us who believe this have it all wrong. 

And then there are others of us, and I'm really talking to Christians here, who try to use our light to point out all the flaws in other people. Our light has turned into a blinding floodlight of judgement. That's not the purpose of this light, either.

Light brings color and beauty to dark places. Light can also serve as a guide. So that means we're supposed to do just that. 

We are meant to go out and bring light, beauty and color to places filled with darkness and hopelessness. We're supposed to live our lives in such a way that they can serve as a guide, whether that's how we pursue our passions, love our spouses or friends, or how we raise our children. 

Also, to truly be light and let our light shine we need to open our mouths and open our eyes, Wagner said. Open your eyes to the possibilities and the great need around you and then be willing to step up to the challenge. Open your mouth and use your words to right a situation whether that be apologizing to a friend or offering someone words of wisdom. 

And I believe we also need to speak up for others. This is exactly why I love using my writing skills to share the stories of others and why I created See Jane Write to help encourage women to tell stories of their own. 

And so, I leave you with this:

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, 

for the rights of all who are destitute. -- Proverbs 31:8

More photos from reCreate

At Friday night's After Party. I'm not sure if this was taken before or after we hit the dance floor to do the Cupid Shuffle.

It was so crowded at this conference that we resorted to using banana peels to save seats for our friends. 

Lunch on the Lawn

I love these girls!

Image by Oliver Kendal via Flickr/Creative Commons

 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

-- Jesus (Matthew 11:28)

I was on an emotional roller coaster in church yesterday. During praise and worship -- the period when we sing songs, close our eyes, and lift our hands to the heavens -- I felt overwhelmed with gratitude as I began to count my blessings. Specifically, I was thinking about the great success I've had with landing freelance writing gigs this year and the success of my women's writing organization See Jane Write. 

But about 20 minutes later I started to feel guilty. Yesterday's sermon was all about slowing down, about making sure you're not so busy that your life gets out of balance and you stop spending as much time as you should with God and with your loved ones. I felt guilty because I had walked into church that morning bubbling over with excitement about all the ideas I have for growing See Jane Write in 2013. And now I felt my ambitions were somehow evil. 

Then my pastor explained that he wasn't telling us we should just give up everything and do nothing. Some of the activities that fill our schedules can actually be life-giving, he said. But the ones that aren't, the ones that leave us feeling empty inside, will eventually lead to burnout. 

The work I do for See Jane Write certainly is life giving, but I still left church knowing I need to work on living a more-balanced life. I must make time to recharge and refuel through prayer and quality time with family and friends and sometimes by just taking a freaking nap! 

All my life I've believe that if I just work harder and harder and harder my dreams will come true. But I'm starting to realize that is not the case. I've always hated the saying "Work smarter, not harder," because I interpreted that phrase as "Take all the shortcuts you can." But that's not it at all. 

During the sermon my pastor compared taking time to recharge and refuel to sharpening a saw. Many of us let our saw get dull and instead of taking a break to sharpen it we keep hacking away at that tree, believing that if we just swing harder and with more might we'll get the job done. But if we would only stop and take time to sharpen the saw then we could chop down that tree with a single swing. 

This week while you're going after your goals and chopping away at your to-do lists, don't forget to sharpen your saw.