Reverb11 Day 4 - Today's Prompt: When did you struggle?
As I mentioned yesterday I've been having a rough time since early August. To avoid throwing a virtual pity party for myself, I'll give you the Cliff's Notes (or Spark Notes for you youngsters).
Since August I've found myself very unhappy professionally (cry every morning before work unhappy) and I've made the mistake of committing myself to far too many community activities. I'm involved in so much I barely have time to sleep.
I'm constantly sick and an illness I was diagnosed with about four years ago has started to get worse. Now this disease is not only affecting my connective tissues and causing severe fatigue and joint and muscle pain, but it is possibly now taking its toll on my nervous system making me prone to depression and making it nearly impossible for me to deal with stress.
I've been a mess, but I haven't lost hope. In fact just today, perhaps just in time for this post, while at a church-related women's retreat I got some direction on what needs to be done to pull myself out of this funk.
I realized I've been running on empty. I've been so busy I haven't taken time to do things that truly nurture my soul -- which for me is spending time studying Scripture and writing in my prayer journal.
A wise woman who spoke at today's retreat also talked about the importance of "condensing your calling." Instead of saying yes to every little thing that sounds a little bit interesting, I need to focus on activities that are related to my true purpose. And the only way to figure out that true purpose, the only way to know my calling is to get back to those quiet times of devotion, those moments of study and prayer.