Nail color: Naughty Nautical by Essie

We ladies who love sparkly or colorful nail polish and other so-called "girly" things are often given a bad rap. We're accused of being a "woman-child" who is romanticizing youth.  And even though we may be helping our friends start businesses or starting companies of our own we're not real adults because we're not knocked up.

Well, this woman child has an aqua green painted middle finger for all those folks buying into that nonsense.

I may have some pastel polish on my nails on any given day but that doesn't make me or my fingertips any less feminist.

This month these feminist fingertips of mine wrote blog posts about balance, BlogHer, e-books, and Beyonce --all with the goal of empowering women. My feminist fingertips typed proposals, promotional material and panel discussion questions and I hosted my very own blogging mini-conference on July 19.


My feminist fingertips wrote an essay for B-Metro magazine on feminist fitness and tackled the question of whether or not it's anti-feminist to want six-pack abs.

And my feminist fingertips wrote a piece for WBHM 90.3 FM (Birmingham's NPR station) about my painful experiences with colorism.

As my pal Carrie Rollwagen once wrote, this "woman-child" business is just plain old chauvinism dressed up as feminism, because it says that what a woman does (like starting a business, honing a talent practicing a craft) is less important than the way she looks while she's doing it."

And don't get me wrong -- I do care about the way I look. As I've said on this blog before, I have some stories and I want to look good while I share them.

But don't judge my work by my wardrobe and don't judge the depth of my feminism by the color of my fingernails.

Image by the USDA via Flickr/Creative Commons

Last Friday Michelle Obama celebrated her 50th birthday. Many people -- from journalists to politicians to everyday citizens -- sent the First Lady well wishes via social media. 

Alabama-based writer Cassie Fambro, however, felt that many of these good intentions missed the mark. Most people seemed more focused on Mrs. Obama's sculpted triceps and trendy frocks than on the work she's done over the past several years, Fambro laments in her article "Twitter wishes Michelle Obama a happy birthday, but makes it about style over substance."

Fambro writes:

Instead of linking to the efforts Michelle Obama has made to promote healthy eating and exercise with "Let's Move," mainstream media was guilty of linking to which dresses they liked best that the first lady wore.

Boston.com, for example, shared 15 style lessons from the First Lady.  CNN focused on "How Michelle Obama used style to move a nation." 

Fambro says at least Bill Clinton got it right. He tweeted: 

Happy 50th to @FLOTUS Michelle Obama. Thanks for the great work you do with @LetsMove to help our kids get healthy.

Fambro's article, made an excellent point but also made me wonder if it will ever be possible for a woman to be celebrated for both style and substance. I certainly admire the FLOTUS for both. I applaud her efforts to end childhood obesity, the successful career she had before becoming First Lady, and the moving speeches she has given while on the campaign trail for her husband. But I also love that she bucks the typical First Lady attire and rocks a style all her own. And, yes, when I'm working out in my living room to Jillian Michaels DVDs I am usually thinking about how I really want some Michelle Obama guns. 

But, again, is it possible for women to be generally recognized for both substance and style? 

I'm a girl who loves fashion. Though I don't claim to be a style maven yet, I do put thought and careful consideration into what I wear - striving to assemble outfits that are both fashionable and functional. So, yes, I walk a little taller when someone compliments what I'm wearing. But to be clear, I don't wear what I wear simply because I'm fishing for compliments. I wear what I wear simply because I want to. Wearing cute clothes is fun and makes me happy. The compliments are just an added perk. And I love Mrs. Obama's style because she seems to be the kind of lady who wears what she wants, also.

And while compliments on my clothes are great, I want even more accolades for my writing and my teaching. My point is I want to be sharp in every sense of the word -- a sharply dressed lady with a sharp mind.

But women who take pride in their appearance are often considered self-centered or vain or less intelligent. 

Even some of my fellow feminists claim that women who bother to paint their nails or pick out pretty pencil skirts are wasting precious time that should be used on writing, organizing and smashing the patriarchy.

So often women are told that we must avoid trendy attire, clothes that accentuate our femininity and colors like pink in order to be taken seriously. 

In her TED talk on feminism, that's now famous after being featured on Beyonce's new album, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie admits that even she has struggled with this: 

The first time I taught a writing class in graduate school, I was worried. I wasn't worried about the material I would teach because I was well prepared and I was going to teach what I enjoyed teaching. Instead I was worried about what to wear. I wanted to be taken seriously. I knew that because I was female I would automatically have to prove my worth and I was worried that if I looked too feminine I would not be taken seriously. I really wanted to wear my shiny lip gloss and my girly skirt, but I decided not to. Instead I wore a very serious, very manly, and very ugly suit because the sad truth is when it comes to appearance we start off with men as the standard, as the norm.

Adichie goes on to point out the fact that when a man is getting ready for a business meeting he never has to worry about looking "too masculine." 

If Adichie could go back in time, she'd wear her shiny lip gloss and girly skirt. 

She says:

I wish I had not worn that ugly suit that day. Had I then had the confidence I have now to be myself my students would have benefited even more from my teaching because I would have been more comfortable and more fully and more truly myself. I have chosen to no longer be apologetic for my femaleness and for my femininity. I want to be respected in all of my femaleness because I deserve to be. 

And so I want my writing and my wardrobe to look good. I don't think I should have to choose between one or the other. 

I'm so proud of Cydni Robertson and the success of her Serve and Strut Birmingham Brunch.

As a writer and English teacher I'm constantly thinking about theme and I have a habit of not only searching for motif in works of literature, but in my life as well. The theme for my day on Saturday, January 4 was clear: beauty. 

I woke up, opened my prayer journal and at the top of the page for January 4 I found this verse: 

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Ecclesiastes 3:11 

I later headed to the Birmingham Serve and Strut Brunch, an event hosted and organized by my friend and fashion blogger Cydni Robertson of ItsHerStrut.com. The brunch featured a three-course meal, a comedy act by Emana Rachelle, and door prizes. The event also included a video and inspiring words from Cydni that could put some strut in any woman's step. 

Cydni wanted the women attending to have the opportunity to "give the gift of style" too and we were asked to donate a pair of new or gently used women’s shoes that will be given to Birmingham-area women’s charities.

But as I sat at the event I realized that there's an even greater gift we women can give to one another: confidence. 

At the start of the event Cydni said something that really stuck with me. She said that insecurity is contagious, but then she reminded us that confidence is contagious too. How true this statement is!

Think about those people in your life who seem confident but when you're around them you feel worse about yourself. Think about those people who try to lift themselves up by putting other people down. Those people clearly aren't truly confident. They're insecure -- very insecure -- and you feel like crap around them because their low self-confidence crud is making you sick. 

Now think about that woman in your life or that speaker you heard at a conference or even a friend you had back in high school or college that made you feel beautiful and bold. That's a woman secure in who she is and you felt like you could do anything when you were around because you were catching a bit of her confidence. 

I felt this happening even as I sat in my seat at Saturday's brunch. Cydni showed a video for which she interviewed female family members of a variety of ages about beauty and self-esteem. You could feel the confidence of these women leap off the screen and land in your lap.

Though the holidays are over, gift-giving should continue all year long, but not in the form of material goods that "moths and vermin destroy" and that thieves can "break in and steal." This year I want to give the gift of confidence by exuding the very confidence I hope to inspire in others. I want to give the gift of confidence to every woman around me -- to the young women that I teach, to the women who attend See Jane Write events, and to the women who read this blog. 

Insecurity is contagious. Confidence is contagious too. What are you spreading? 

#feministselfie in the classroom!

Earlier today when I was supposed to be grading tests on American Romanticism I decided to procrastinate for a few minutes and log on to Twitter. I noticed the hashtag #feministselfie was trending and, of course, I had to figure out why. 

Jezebel writer Erin Gloria Ryan posted an article this afternoon called "Selfies Aren't Empowering. They're a Cry for Help." In the piece Ryan argues that selfless are just "a high tech reflection" of the way society teaches women and girls that their physical attractiveness is their most important quality. Ryan briefly mentions an article by Rachel Simmons at Slate that seeks to defend the selfie. 

Simmons writes: 

The selfie is a tiny pulse of girl pride—a shout-out to the self. Earlier this week, the first four women to complete Marine infantry combat training posted a jubilant selfie. (Nancy Pelosi tweeted it as "selfie of the year.") If you write off the endless stream of posts as image-conscious narcissism, you'll miss the chance to watch girls practice promoting themselves—a skill that boys are otherwise given more permission to develop, and which serves them later on when they negotiate for raises and promotions.

But Ryan quickly dismisses this idea saying, "I absolutely don't disagree that the three Marines who passed infantry combat training kick ass, and that photo they took was inspiring... And if selfies were typically jubilant post-achievement photos snapped by women proud of what they'd accomplished, then Simmons' assertion that selfies are 'tiny pulse(s) of girl pride' would be apt."

But most selfless, Ryan says, are the digital equivalent of  "walking up to a stranger, tilting your head downward at a 45-degree angle, duckfacing, pushing your tits together, and screaming 'DO YOU THINK I'M PRETTY!'"

Ryan's article quickly enraged feminists who responded by taking selfies and posting them with the hashtag #feministselfie. Two of my favorites are below: 

dulce de leche @bad_dominicana

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taking time out of my day to admire myself in the midst of constant antiblack misogynist degradation. #feministselfie

Auntie Di @OhDianeMarie

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In my selfie, I am barefoot in the kitchen. STILL A FEMINIST! @Jezebel!! #feministselfie

And so I quickly snapped a #feministselfie of my own. 

Even though I hardly ever take selfies, Ryan's article didn't sit well with me either. It seemed too similar to arguments against wearing makeup or cute clothes. There's always an assumption that if a woman does either of these she's doing them not for herself but for male approval. And that's simply not true. 

I love eyeshadow because I love blending cooper and bronze tones on my eyelids every morning. I wear pencil skirts because they make me happy. 

While I see Ryan's point and while I do believe there are some girls out there are snapping selfies because they want the Interwebz to tell them they're sexy, I can't get on board with the idea of completing writing off the selfie as anti-feminist or evidence that we're all suffering under the male gaze.  

Maybe it's because my friends don't take pictures of their tits pushed together. Or maybe it's because I'm a writer. 

I love looking at the self-portraits of my female friends in my Instagram feed and I see a story -- a valid and valuable story -- in every photo, whether that story is about a major accomplishment or just the story of a woman who loves the way she looks today. The selfie is simply a memento of both special occasions and everyday life. 

Do I believe the selfie is the ultimate tool of self-empowerment? No. But it's not the ultimate tool of misogyny and patriarchy either. 

And why can't a woman just take a freaking picture of herself without needing to justify why she did it?!

When I look through my Instagram and Facebook feeds and I see fierce female faces staring back at me I can't help but smile. No, not every photo is in celebration of a job promotion or college graduation, but nearly every photo -- to me at least -- is a celebration of women. 

I believe feminist writer Feminista Jones said it best: 

A$AP Feminist @FeministaJones

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The way my feminism works @jezebel is that we celebrate the beauty of all women, in as many ways as possible.

1:38 PM - 21 Nov 2013

"When you bring everything you have to every situation, that's when the magic happens." 

-- Jillian Michaels

The words above are the words that motivate me to press on during circuit one of week one of Jillian Michael's Ripped in 30 fitness DVD. Those are the words that push me to keep going even though I feel like I'm going to vomit or faint or vomit and faint, landing face first in my own puke. 

And those words are a great example of how Jillian Michaels makes me a better writer. 

I started Ripped in 30 on Aug. 1 and spent June working through Michaels' wildly popular 30-Day Shred DVD. If you know me outside of the blogosphere, you know I talk about Jillian Michaels all the time. I call myself a true believer, a Jillian Michaels disciple. When at a birthday party this past weekend and someone mentioned that she was having trouble getting motivated to work out I saw this as a prime time to be a witness. I started encouraging her to try one of Michaels' videos. 



My husband, who was also at the party, sighed and said, "You couldn't wait to preach the Jillian Michaels gospel."

Hallelujah! 

My love for Jillian Michaels, however, surprisingly has more to do with my writing than my weight. 

Michaels has a way of not only making you feel like you can accomplish fantastic fitness feats, but that you can accomplish anything you want in any other part of your life too. As I wrote last month in an article for See Jane Write Magazine: 

In level two of 30-Day Shred, Jillian says, “When you see how strong you are physically, it’s going to transcend into every other facet of your life.” 

I didn’t pay much attention to this statement at first. It’s hard to concentrate on words of encouragement when you feel like you’re going to vomit up your heart. But one day when the moves started to get a tiny bit easier and my arms started to feel a tiny bit stronger, I realized she was right. 

When you complete a challenging workout, when you lift more weight than you ever thought you could, when you run your first marathon, something inside you changes, and not just your cholesterol. You stare at that exercise DVD, or those weights, or that finisher’s medal and you think, “If I can do that, I can do anything.” 

If you can finish that marathon, you can finish writing that book. If you can stick with that Insanity DVD for 60 days, you can stick with your blog. If you can bench press all that weight, you can press send on that pitch letter to your favorite magazine. 

You can do it. 

Jillian Michaels said so.

What are you fitness plans for August? 

I didn't own a cast iron skillet
until a friend bought me this one for my 32nd birthday.
Does this make me a poor excuse for a Southern woman?

"You are not a real Southern woman!" my mother-in-law said when she learned that I'm not a fan of collard greens. How could a girl born and raised in Alabama not like collard greens, she asked. 

Though my mother-in-law was joking, this wasn't the first time I was accused of not being a true Southern woman and it certainly was not the last. I'm a liberal feminist who doesn't want children and who hates to cook. By the stereotypical notion of what it means to be a Southern lady, the only thing Southern about me is my drawl. And some folks even claim not to notice that, which is crazy because I can add extra syllables to words with the best of them.

Though I did feel quite at home when I lived on the West Coast and in the Mid West, I am glad to be back in Alabama, back in the Deep South -- my true home. And I love being from the South. I am proud of my roots. I am proud to be a Southern woman, and, yes, I am a real Southern lady, at least by my own definition. 

I am the woman who understands the value of family, food, fashion, and faith. And this is what makes me a true Southern woman.

I may not want children, but I still value family. I believe in honoring my parents and my husband with all that I do. My brother is one of my very best friends. And, as I've mentioned before, I get really annoyed when people say to my husband and me, "Don't you two want to start a family?" We have traditions, great memories, and unconditional love for each other. We are a family.

And I keep my family fed, even though I don't like to cook. And if you come to my house, I'll feed you too because I believe in Southern hospitality. And I believe that people bond best over food, which is why if you want to hang out with me I'm going to always suggest we go out for brunch, lunch, dinner, or any other meal I can think of.

And when we do go out, my outfit will be cute. In the South dressing inappropriately for an occasion is considered just downright rude. Thus, down here fashion isn't about vanity, it's about good manners. So if you've invited me to an event in July, you better believe I've already started thinking about what I'm going to wear.

Though I am liberal on several social issues, I am a woman of faith. I'm a church-going gal and proud of it. My relationship with God directs my decisions and colors my worldview. Albert Einstein once said "There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle." I believe everything is a miracle and I believe that because of my faith in my God. 

And in case you're thinking I should have added football to my list, I have that covered too: Roll Tide!

Proud Southern Lady!

This post was also published on my new blog on The Southern Coterie, "the social network of the SOUTH." This online community is for Southerners and all those who love the South. 

A feminist in a dress! Gasp!

Can a black woman be a feminist?

I've been told on more than one occasion that the answer to that question is "No!" Last week I shared my story of being told I can't be a feminist because I'm black in a blog post for Birmingham's NPR station WBHM. When someone tells me, however, that I don't look like a feminist -- and I get that comment a lot -- they usually aren't talking about my race. 

Back when I worked for a weekly lifestyles magazine in Louisville, I frequently wrote articles that might have caused female readers to raise their fists in the air and yell "Girl power!" I quickly became known for as the paper's resident feminist. 

Yet, when a young woman from another department came to our office to discuss an idea she had for a women's empowerment project she went to the female reporter who sat in the cubicle next to mine.  She even said to my colleague, "I know you write a lot about feminism and that it's something very important to you." Everyone in the office, including my colleague to whom she was speaking, stared at her with confused looks on their faces. Then my colleague pointed to me and said, "Javacia writes about women's issues. Not me. You're probably talking about her articles." The look of shock on her face was priceless. 

When this woman came to our office in search the resident feminist she didn't even bother asking anyone to point her in the right direction. She walked directly to my colleague. Did she assume that I couldn't have been the feminist writer because I'm black? Possibly, but I doubt my race had much to do with it. 

My co-worker only wore neutral colors and never wore makeup or heels. She also refused to shave her arm pits or legs. Meanwhile, I was probably sitting there in a floral top, trendy jeans and pumps. I'm sure my eyeshadow was perfectly color coordinated with my outfit and my cubicle looked like the color pink had thrown up all over it. In other words, I'm sure that woman didn't come to me because she didn't think I looked like a feminist. 

Can a woman be both feminist and so-called feminine? Absolutely! And frankly I'm tired of having this conversation. It's getting old, people.

Julia Gazdag recently addressed this topic quite wonderfully in a post for Hello Giggles and in that article referenced a quote from Caitlin Moran who reminds us that "the purpose of feminism isn't to make a particular type of woman." 

Gazdag goes on to say: 

The idea that women cannot express their femininity and be autonomous is really saying that women must emulate men to have a voice, when in fact, the goal of feminism is for every woman to feel empowered as a person instead of feeling gendered.

Amen. 

I believe in the equality of the sexes and this is what makes me a feminist. Period. Writing and empowering other women to write is what I consider my calling and this calling has become my form of feminist activism. The validity of my work should not be questioned simply because the finger tips typing my feminist texts are adorned with fuchsia nail polish. 

Image by Mike Baird via Flickr/Creative Commons
Maybe after exercising daily for a few months I'll be able to go out in public wearing a sports bra and no shirt. 

Even though I'm supposed to be training for a half-marathon, lately I have been completely unmotivated to exercise. I'm bored with routine and I'm discouraged by a lack of results. 

Recently a friend of mine told me she plans to exercise every day for a year and blog about her experience. When she told me I my first thought was, "Wow! That's so awesome. I could never do that." But why not? Why couldn't I do it?

So I started thinking I'd give it a try. I figured I'd begin on January 1. Then I remembered a recent blog post by my pal Tanya Sylvan. In her post she shared this quote:

“If we wait for the moment when everything, absolutely everything is ready, we shall never begin.” 
– Ivan Turgenev

Tanya went on to say: 

We can’t predict what our life will be like in two weeks or two years, yet we sit and wait for that “perfect moment” to make a leap into something new.

I do this all of the time. Everyone does. I hear people say, “Next year I’ll run a 5k” or “My diet will start after the weekend.” Hell, I’m guilty of waiting until Monday to start new training plans or workout routines. In our minds we rationalize it as waiting for a fresh start or blank slate. In reality, it’s just an excuse.

Guilty as charged. Why do I need to wait until Jan. 1 to start exercising daily? I should have a sense of urgency about this matter. My physical, emotional, and mental health (all of which are improved by exercise) are too important to be put on hold. 

And so here goes. Starting today I'm going to exercise daily for 30 to 60 minutes for the next 365 days. 

Though I occasionally will update you babes on my progress, I don't plan to blog about this regularly. Instead I'll be tweeting my daily workouts. So be sure to follow me @writeousbabe. 

Wish me luck! 

A few of the ladies of See Jane Write before our morning walk

I have a confession. 

When I came up with the idea for #bloglikecrazy several months ago I had an ulterior motive. While I, of course, wanted the challenge to get other women motivated to write and blog regularly, I also hoped the project would increase traffic to my blog. And I did see a small boost in traffic, but by the second week of the challenge I didn't care about my stats. Something much more important and more exciting was happening. Thanks to the number of See Jane Write members participating, women bloggers in the Birmingham area started using #bloglikecrazy to build community. The ladies shared their posts on the See Jane Write Facebook group page and in the process discovered a host of common interests. One thing we quickly learned was that several of us were fitness fanatics. 

So Tanya Sylvan had the great idea of organizing See Jane Move. 

Yesterday morning I started my day with a gathering of a few of my favorite women who write at Railroad Park. The weather was absolutely perfect as we did laps around the park for about an hour and then sat down for a potluck brunch. We noshed on fruit, confetti rice and bean salad, and other healthy snacks and talked about nearly everything from personal branding to blog design to DIY manicures. 

Here we are before sitting down for our healthy potluck brunch

And as I sat there I saw a blogging lesson come to life: it's all about people, not pageviews. No amount of web hits could have created the joy I felt this morning.  

I left the park feeling so inspired by the girl power in the air and very hopeful about the future of See Jane Write. 

See Jane Move was an excellent way to start a Saturday and a perfect way to end #bloglikecrazy. 

Ironically, one of the best things that have come out of the #bloglikecrazy project has nothing to do with blogging.

Throughout the month members of See Jane Write who have participated in the challenge have been sharing links to their posts on See Jane Write Facebook group page. Through these posts we quickly realized that many, if not most, of us have a strong interest in fitness.

So Tanya Sylvan had the great idea of organizing See Jane Move -- an event to both celebrate the completion of #bloglikecrazy and help us all in our quest to stay or get in shape.

On Saturday, Dec. 1 at 10 a.m. we will meet at Railroad Park, 1600 1st Ave. S., Birmingham, for a walk/run. Feel free to roller skate or dance or do whatever you please. Just keep moving.

Bring a healthy snack to share. After exercising we will sit down and enjoy a little picnic brunch.

I hope those of you in Birmingham this weekend will join us. You can RSVP here or leave a comment on this post letting me know you'll be there.

I've said this before and I'll say it again: why should writers care about fitness? You can't write a best seller or an award-winning blog if you're dead!

Cross-posted at the See Jane Write blog. 

Today I ended my brief hiatus from running.

Using one of the Hal Higdon programs, I am now training to run my second half marathon. 

I will be honest with you: I don't want to run another half marathon. I'm tired of running. Within the past several months it somehow stopped being fun. Furthermore, I gained weight the last time I was training for the Mercedes Half and since I currently weigh more than I ever have in my entire life, I can't really afford to pack on any additional pounds. 

But I'm training for this race nonetheless. Why? 

Well, I've mentioned before that I'm a quitter. When I get bored with something I have absolutely no problem just walking away. Sometimes this is a good thing. I don't waste time on television shows after the story lines get ridiculous. And, with one exception, I've dropped no-good boyfriends pretty quickly. 

But this can also be bad. I believe one of the reasons I haven't achieved the success I dream of in my writing career is because I don't follow through. I very easily get bored with blogs and book ideas and abandon them for a shiny new project. If I could just stick to something I think I could really have a breakthrough. 

So I'm training for this half marathon as a way of proving to myself that I can follow through. I keep thinking that if I stick to running perhaps through this I can condition myself to stick to other endeavors too and this quitter will finally be reformed. 

For the past two weeks I've been rocking straight hair. This isn't something that happens often. About twice a year I go to my favorite hairstylist to have my hair flat ironed straight. My stylist prefers to cut my hair while it's straight (although she can cut curly hair too) so usually I get my hair flat ironed when I need a trim. Sometimes, I get my hair straightened just because I'm bored; and sometimes it's because I want to wear a cute hat (most of which will not fit over my crazy curls).

The four to six months in between my flat iron rendezvous is somehow enough time for nearly every person in my life to forget that I occasionally straighten my hair. Therefore, when I do smooth out my curls, I am inevitably inundated with questions such as "Is that really all your hair?" A student of mine actually had the audacity to ask me this (and with a stank attitude, might I add). I guess this child doesn't understand that curly hair will be longer when straightened. And I teach at a school for smart kids! Sigh.



The question that bothers me most, however, is "Why don't you wear your hair straight all the time?" 

Really, people? Does my natural hair bother you that much that you'd prefer I heat and beat it into submission all year? If so, that sucks for you because I love my curls. 

Even though India Arie's song "I Am Not My Hair" was once my mantra, I must admit I feel a bit weird when my hair is straight. When my hair is curly I feel like more of myself and I feel more carefree. With straight tresses I worry way too much about my hair getting wet. And I when I go to the gym all I can do is weight training because after even a short cardio workout my curls will come back with a vengeance before I'm ready for them to return. 

Besides, my curly coif is like my trademark or my brand and how people find me in a crowd. 

So today the curls are back. Oh, how I've missed you. 

Image by Rosmary via Flickr/Creative Commons

 The cool crisp air greeting me in the mornings and the bright red leaves on the trees outside my patio window signal that fall is here and 2012 is coming to end. For me this is a cue to start jotting down goals for 2013. But thanks to Katie at A Place to Dwell, I've decided to put my planning process for 2013 on hold for a bit and do something new -- 4 Simple Goals. This project is the brainchild of Elsie at A Beautiful Mess and you can find the rules in detail here. Essentially, you pick simple, activity-oriented goals that will make your life richer, happier, and healthier. Elsie also recommends that you reward yourself for sticking to your plans and that you blog about your progress. Here are my 4 Simple Goals Before 2013:

1. Start exercising 6 days a week. Supposedly we humans develop habits after doing something for 21 days, so once I've exercised 6 days a week for three weeks I'll consider this goal accomplished. 

2. Read and meditate on Scripture daily. Again, I will consider this goal accomplished after sticking with it for for 21 days. Since I'm so into blogging and building community between women, I think one thing that can help me with this goal is the blog SheReadsTruth.com. So I plan to follow the Bible reading plans offered there and chat with other women involved in this online community. 

3. Finish reading How to Be a Woman by Caitlin Moran. 

4. Spend more quality time with my husband. We've both been so busy lately we barely see each other. Before this year is over I'd like us to sit down and discuss how we can be more intentional about prioritizing our relationship. 

OK, it's your turn. What are your 4 Simple Goals (Before 2013)?

Image by Paul H. via Flickr/Creative Commons

 A few weeks ago I took a pregnancy test.

No, not because I'm trying to get knocked up. (Did you not read this post?) And no, I hadn't missed my period. But I figured the growth of a tiny human in my body was the only explanation for my rapidly expanding waistline. But, alas, the test was negative. So the only person I can blame for this bulging belly is myself.

Lately I have been extremely busy juggling my teaching career with my freelance writing gigs, working to grow See Jane Write, and striving to maintain an active church life and social life. Thus, I've had little time for exercise. I usually only work out twice a week, which is quite a difference from the 6-days-a-week regimen I usually maintain. And when I do have free time to hit the gym or running trail, I'm usually too exhausted to do so.

Meanwhile, I've been eating like I really am pregnant. I eat ALL THE TIME. You see, I'm an emotional eater. While I'm grateful for all the opportunities that have been coming my way lately, I've been very stressed and that stress is making me feel down. When I'm sad, I eat. The problem is I also think eating is the best way to celebrate. So when I'm happy, I eat. Ergo, whether I'm wallowing in self-pity or jumping for joy, I want cupcakes nearby.

I do have the ability to control this. When I am focused on a fitness goal I can overcome my urge to eat an entire bag of candy corn and make more healthy choices. Trouble is I haven't been truly focused on a fitness goal since I completed my first half-marathon.

So it's time to get focused. My new fitness goal is two-fold: 1) I want to lose 30 pounds and 2) I want to complete my second half-marathon in February.

Training for the half will begin Mon., Nov. 26 and I'll be using the Hal Higdon plan for novice runners.

The weight loss plan begins today. I'm going to the gym after work no matter how tired I am. My plan is to try to burn 3500 extra calories a week through exercise. Additionally, I'll be tracking my activity and my caloric intake with MyFitnessPal.com. If that doesn't seem to be making much of a difference by the end of the year, I'm going to do Weight Watchers again, something I've had success with before.

So, is this beginning of a weekly Weigh-In Wednesday feature here at The Writeous Babe Project? Maybe. Maybe not.

But I do plan to blog about my efforts to get healthy and fit. Why? Because I can't write the next great  literary masterpiece or spread the gospel of Southern Fried Feminism if I'm dead.

Last week this time I was lying on the sofa trying to recover from running 13.1 miles. Yes, that's right: I have checked off "Complete a half marathon" from my 31 before 32 list. 

Below is a little essay titled Why I Run that I wrote about the experience for GeorgiaMae.com.   Enjoy!

xo,

javacia a.k.a. writeous babe

***

Sunday I completed the Mercedes Half-Marathon here in Birmingham. And I survived!

There was good reason not to run 13.1 miles yesterday. I even had a doctor’s excuse. You see, I have a connective tissue disease that’s trying its best to destroy my joints and muscles. So my doctor is constantly discouraging me from high impact exercises and suggesting that I stick to water aerobics and cycling instead.

To top things off, after an unseasonably warm winter filled with 65-degree days, this weekend Birmingham experienced its coldest days of the season. The temperature didn’t rise above freezing during the race. (And my connective tissue ailment is aggravated by cold weather.)

As the day of the race drew closer and closer, I began to doubt myself. I began to wonder if I'd made a mistake signing up for this. "Why did you think you could actually do this?" I started to ask myself. 

But my husband and closest friends kept encouraging me and reminding me of all the training I'd been doing for months. They reminded me that during that training I had run 11 miles, twice, so two more would be a piece of cake. 

And they were right. Sort of. Not a single mile of the race was a cake walk. Thanks to the cold I couldn't feel my hands for the second half of the run even though I was wearing thick gloves. (Have you ever tried to tie your shoes with numb fingers? Doesn't go so well.) And thanks to that pesky connective tissue disease I spent most of the run battling an achy ankle, a throbbing knee or a stinging shin (though I'm thankful my body was kind enough to not allow all three to hurt at once). But I kept going. I kept reminding myself why I run in the first place and how those reasons outweigh all the factors that tell me I should stay home on the couch.

I run because I have a disease that tells me I can’t.

I run for all the women suffering from illnesses that prevent them from living their best lives.

I run because the women of my running group Black Girls Run Birmingham convinced me that I could.

I run so that women and girls of color can see someone who looks like them crossing the finish line.

I run to defy the stereotype that we Southerners are all sedentary.

I run to hear my husband say, “Javacia, I am so proud of you.”

And I run because my God told me, in Proverbs 4:12, that “When you walk, your steps will not be hampered; when you run, you will not stumble.”